The Talk

January 17, 2018

A relaxing drive.   As relaxing as a drive on I-25 can be.  Nothing on the radio of interest... 

Or at a level a 9 and 11 year old can hear.  


 Out of the blue Thing 1 says: 

"So Mom… what is sex"


Uh oh

Truly at this point in my singlehood, I think I can say I don’t remember.

It is a fair and not complete lie.


“Is it when a boy and girl get together?”


“Why yes, yes it is.”


“well what do they do?”


"why do you ask?"


"Mom... do they... do they kiss?"  


“well… yes"



“Mom my friend said it is something else…

Does the boy part actually touch the girl part.”






Most of the time what I say appears to be absolute idiocy 

And their faces clearly depict that.


This is one time

(of many...most involve trash removal and anything that requires a hammer or wrench)


I wish I had a husband


I am not sure what He would do

because with girls 

this seems to fall in the Mom wheelhouse


but at least I could blame some on this on his unrefined behavior 

or make him go get me some wine



“well honey… when you are a grownup and over 30, yes that happens.”


Thing 1 EWWWWWWWWW.  I am not ever going to do that.


Out of the mouths of babes


Thing 2 "That is gross… I think I am gay now Mom.”


“Oh okay”



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